Bryan Abasolo saw firsthand how thorny comments can get online.

As a bachelorette alum Rachel LindsayIn his other half, Abasolo has a front row seat for all of the troubling things people write to his wife on social media. Although he would prefer her not to respond to their terrible words, they have since found that the answer has an equally bizarre result.

“I feel like when you give them energy, you bring something to life that should never have lived,” he said on his Talking It Out podcast. “People write her the most disgusting, horrific things and she will actually answer, not disrespectful or anything, but she will answer with – she’s a lawyer, so she’s going to hit her back with the facts, like, ‘How did I do that? How did I do this?'”

Your reactions are just as unsettling. “The person doesn’t even respond with the answers,” continued Abasolo. “Instead, they reply, ‘Oh my god, I love you. I didn’t think you’d answer ‘and how did you just say what you just said so viciously and then just totally turn around? Like, ‘Oh my god, I’m sorry. I didn’t think you’d answer. “